Today I found a poem that I need to share with everyone:

“For a Friend ~ Meagan Riley

your heart is ablaze like a grease fire,

and even though you know better, 

you run it under the tap.

and the slick flames run down your body

and they don’t stop…

until he puts his hands on you

and smothers them out.

this is step one.

 

after this his hands are too heavy,

too hot;

they stick to your skin, held there by the burnt mottled clumps of grease,

the remains of what burned up your heart entirely…

not long ago.

your mind, untouched by the fervid flames, remembers only the pain.

you wonder if this is worth it at all.

it is not.

this is step two.

 

when he removes his hands, there are charred imprints left on your previously unmarked skin.

everyone can see them – you know everyone can see them.

you catch their eyes catching glimpses of the black hue of char on your arms,

on your neck,

on your legs.

it is so much worse than any burn you would have gotten if you had let the fire burn.

this is step three.

 

but you will move on,

and someone will find you and run his hands over

and over the charred and scarred remains of your heart and heal you,

and it will not feel like the wild hot rush of a grease fire when you look up at him,

but rather the soothing kiss of water from the tap running over the burn.

his hands run cold and bring goosebumps to your flesh,

and his embrace is softer than anything you could have imagined.

 

you have done it. this is step four.”

I think I like this so much because it finally puts words to what I’ve been feeling. This is exactly what it feels like. Yeah there is the initial break, but it feels much more like a burn. The pain makes you want to scream, and it gets way worse before it can start to heal and get better. You have to scrape the dead skin off before you can heal and be new again.